RPG Gaming

D&D: Only A Game?
Answer: Yes!
Part I

By Marcus Pan

Recently, while sitting around a campfire with friends, the subject of talk turned to role playing games. Of course, it was AD&D in particular. As the discussion moved on, one of my fellowman pulled out a pamphlet entitled, "D&D: Only a Game?" Written by a group calling themselves the Christian Life Ministries, it details the "evils" of Dungeons and Dragons. Needless to say, we had many laughs at this piece of work.

Hilarious as it was, this pamphlet was still attacking all RPG players everywhere. It was the "last straw". I sat through all the scoffing, the insinuations of "extreme Satanism and evilness" within the game and I have listened to psychiatric arguments against the game. I've even been psychiatrically evaluated as an "evil, non-conforming, definitely Satanic person. AvidD&D fan..." myself. But I will no longer sit idly by while the wonderful game of Dungeons and Dragons is made a mockery of.

Welcome to the first part of a three-part series retaliating against these hypocrites.

Part I
Christian Hypocrites

Warning:
If you are an orthodox Christian who is easily religiously offended and do not have an open mind to other people's opinions…

BURN THIS MAG NOW!

Aanton Szandor LaVey summed it up best in his Satanic Bible. I believe he hit it right when he stated the Christian church as hypocritical. I find this true in many instances and will chronilize my beliefs here for you. But I must say, these people (and I use this term loosely) calling themselves the Christian Life Ministries take hipocricy to the point where I actually find it intriguing.

First of all, how can anyone or anything be "All-Forgiving"? In other words, no matter what you do, no matter how many sins you commit, "God" will forgive you with no questions asked? I wish the legal system was like that. In other words, no sin, however great, is unforgivable. I have seen the spawn of hypocrisy this breeds as I watch people sin greatly through the week, then forgiven on church Sunday only to perform these very same sins again. It forms a chain of fallacy which is hilarious to watch.

The Christian Bible tells us to "turn the other cheek". I have yet, throughout my entire life, found anyone, of Christian faith or otherwise, follow this commandment. Nobody I know will sit idly by while some crazed lunatic who is frothing at the mouth beats the living pulp from their bodies. Everyone I have known will strike back and of you, dear reader, claim you will not you are either lying or don't know anything about the world we live in.

"If one person hits you in the cheek, SMITE him in the OTHER!"
--Anton Szandor LaVey--
Father of the Church of Satan
--"Satanic Bible"--

The above is a "Rule of the World", and if you claim otherwise you are obviously lost and out-of-touch with reality.

Meanwhile, the Christian Life Ministries take this idea of sinning even further. According to them, if you so much as think an "unpure" or "evil" thought you are guilty of performing this thought. For example, if you get into an argument with another person and think to yourself, "I could just kill you..." you are a murderer. Haven't we all done this? I'm sure you have. Well, I say what's the big deal? Just simply look to the sky, mutter a half-hearted apology and you are forgiven. Right? This is the load of crap these hypocrites teach.

Get yourself a copy of "LEGENDS," Issue No. 2, and read:

D&D: Only A Game?
Answer: Yes!
Part II

"Fair is Foul
and
Foul is Fair"

And the foolish shall cower, and crawl into their holes…

The above item may have been edited by the author since its first appearance in Legends No. 1.