Reborn

By KT Lowe

Chain Border

I have no problems in believing.
The alternatives are nonviable and invalid.
Every choice is mine if I choose to select
it's my turn and I will go forth, utilize,
I am the master, mistress, whip and slave.

A law is only accepted if it is found necessary and reasonable.
A law is only necessary when someone is in violation,
and most violations are a matter of degree.
I will live by my laws, which I regulate accordingly,
for guilt is the most complete method of punishment.
It lingers in the memories others would bury,
and I rummage through the dead like browsing old books.
I am the codifier of my future so I need speak to no one else.
My only violations, then, will be weakenings of my will, which
I impose without mercy, so I never worry at all.

If I see the world through my innerspace,
I will never understand the whole.
While I can read, exist,
dance, fuck, intellectualise and avoid,
everything I experience must still be internalized;
I will never get the complete picture.
I will never understand,
but neither will anyone else.
Unless someone is paying rapt attention,
no one will believe me when I am
clean enough to demonstrate
the clearest perspective that exists
once it is formed.

When God comes to judge the living,
He will have no one to judge.
We will never have seen him at all.
God has already realized
it is useless to judge the dead.
He will go back to Heaven wondering
where it all went wrong.

Come join me - my law is free
my water is as clear as my eyes.
My mind attuned to the biology of thought,
the logic of love,
spiraled to find my way of life -
it is right for me but death to most.
Maybe you can understand, and I hope you do;
a nation of one is hard to control.
Power for those who need to control
but I promise you will be out of my reach.
A treaty, please,
an agreement to experience
what it is, potentially,
to be me and/or you.
I have no power over your decisions
and the way out is through.
I need to ask you if you will enter into me
your life in my throat I can speak your truth
but I will still need you to clarify to create
so possibly I will grow into my own.

My faith walked for me
to the land of the gods.
lay prostrate before the infinity
that which becomes my fate.
It poured out of me, ran on the ground slow
blood and bread and roses in water.

It abandoned me to its own dream state
leave me naked, cold from the graveside.
Dead in my arms I crouched
in the seaweed sewer to vomit
my bones seeded into branches each soul thrown
through pores through the meat metal I could
no longer trap my lives ahead to channel
Drowned to my knees breath stolen air
in live plant material suckle
from my fingertips to
pull up in smoke
I draw my eyes open with my
fallen eyeteeth
scaled weblegs sludged my nails out
from crystallic hands
I drag myself out of stagnant water -
my beloved has been watching me.

I remember him before I was born
the crimson layers of his hands onto mine
and the pronouncement of my name
when I was accepted.
My beloved close and light
will not clothe me
for fear he would be lying;
the only living presence I have yet to see.
He has dried the last of the mud from me
and will touch me so I see
but he will not speak and the silence is alive
weighed with thoughts I no longer need to express.
I can smell his body before we make love -
the freedom to need, we agreed -
I know the assent in the back of our lives
A lesson in acceptance it was I
who was reborn to a dead world.
the living are no more, they never understood
when there is no death, there are no limits
Nothing is true, everything is permitted
complete, prescient, unique
done unto itself and to me.

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