CD Review

18 Speed Tranny – “Haulin' Ass”

By Dan Century

Haulin' Ass18 Speed Tranny is back with Haulin' Ass, another white-hot slab of finger bangin', gear jammin', knuckle poppin', crank snortin' rock n' roll! If your ears had septums, they would bleed and collapse after listening to this disc. Your teeth will fall out, you'll start living off of credit cards and you'll lose your apartment and have to sleep on your sister's couch. After listening to this disc for a week in a row, you'll end up on Cops in a motel room with a fat woman who cuts her own hair, two skinheads and suitcases full of raw chemicals. This disc is so powerful it will destroy your life.

Haulin' Ass is like Satan's mix tape of the rawest moments of rock n' roll. Intentional or not, I can hear a little bit of Black Flag, Rollins, old Metallica, MC5, Cheech and Chong, Sabbath, even the Beatles – it's like they've taken the raw materials of rock and fused them into an even rawer rock n' rock amalgam all their own.

Just look at these song titles: Wrong Side of the Law, Gorillaz on Crack, Broken Mind, Pink Hole, Wasting Away, Born Under a Bad Sign. You just know they're badass – and you know they kick ass.

What other band would have the balls to write a song like this:

So you came over, and we had fun
I felt you up, and you know that I went down
We had a good time, we always do
Now bring your sister over, and I'll do her too, yeah!

Other ways to describe this album:

Haulin' Ass will blast through your speakers like a trucker with a trailer full of un-taxed cigarettes, a nose full of crank and a hankerin' for a Lot Lizard to his slobber on his shifter knob
Haulin' Ass is like a rock n' roll meth lab on wheels.
Haulin' Ass is the antidote for your suburban, SUV, Starbucks lifestyle.

The CD is a measly $8 too – why that's cheaper than a pack of Camels and fist full of Slim Jims, and it will last you a whole lot longer too!

Contact Information:
18 Speed Tranny
Post: PO Box 1042, Elk Grove, IL, 60009-1042, USA
Phone: (847) 357-8850