Rants & Essays

Fun With Candles

By Lasky

CandleI had a conversation with a friend of mine the other day. He had a nasty burn on his chest (right on the nipple) and was bitching about his goth girlfriend who burned him. I managed to get his story out of him with a few drinks and some conversation.

It seems that they had entered a new chapter in their sex lives, and that they had begun experimenting with the erotic uses of candle wax. They didn't really know what they were doing though...the result: a nasty burn and some bruised feelings.

As a public service announcement I thought I'd give a few tips that have worked well for me in the past.

1. Don't use beeswax candles. I know they're organic and nifty and all that, but they having a burning temperature much higher than your average store-bought candle. Also, the wax itself can sometimes ignite on skin. The results can be nasty. Try standard issue white taper candles, or votive candles. I know black is the cool color to use but the dyes in the wax can carry too much of a temperature charge.

2. Try to keep some distance between the candle and the exposed skin. Start high and slowly drip lower. On especially sensitive areas (You know where!), start about 20-30 inches above the skin. The sensation is still nifty and you won't burn your partner.

3. Have ice cubes, in a small dish, near your bed (Couch, loveseat, dead goat skin, whatever it is you are doing the do on). They lower the temp of the wax and they can create a truly stunningly pleasant reaction. Blindfolds are a big help with these (evil grin).

4. Sealing wax, like that used for letters, is a wild card. Sometimes it's very pleasant, sometimes it's like napalm. Test it on your wrist first.

5. Go light on the latex and PVC clothing if you're going to be toying with the hot stuff. Some kinds of rubber have exceedingly low melting points. You could ruin a really cool outfit (or piss off your mistress, which is much worse).

Anyway good luck, and happy fornication, you sexy creature of the night you!