Drunken Elf

By Albatross

The summer heat is blazing
And the reindeer out a grazing
without thought, they've never thunk
Why Santa's always blazing drunk.

And thus they do avoid confusion
And promote the old illusion
That the elf's vast northern spread
Is bereft of all the dread

That plagues all us normal folk
In our weary lives of work
And makes us hanker for the bottle
Though we love, yet we will throttle

Family members and close friends
Then as the year comes to and end
We hide all anger and we choose
(Like Mrs. Santa's hidden bruises)

To forget that we are beasts
And we devour our Christmas feasts
By the blaze of a warm fire
And the whole of our desire

Is to peace and love and bliss
We cannot know all that's amiss
Up at the far away North pole
A real nasty little hole

Where Santa plagues his little elves
And takes all glory to himself.
And he bellows and he screams
And in short is very mean.

Whatever propaganda calls it
Santa's still an alcoholic
And our children ought to fear
At the sound of those reindeer.